Monday, October 10, 2011

Tips From My Mom #14

In the mid 60s, when my parents were a young couple living in the newly developed outer reaches of Long Island, times were sometimes tough.

My mom was a housewife taking care of three young boys (an active 2-year-old and adorable newborn twins) and often struggling to manage the finances.

Juggling bills became an art.

Sometimes all the bills were tossed in the air and the ones that landed face-down would be paid, while other months saw the bills that were current put aside so those that were late could be paid.

Yet, every month the bills relentlessly arrived in the mail.

It became a source of great worry and stress for my parents.  So, one day my dad told my mom to throw all of the bills into the fireplace.  She did.  And to her surprise...she felt better.

Over the years my mom has shared this story with us whenever something feels like it is becoming too much, when things feel out of control and cause nothing but distress.

It has become a parable for letting go of those worries because in the end "the bills" will come back next month. All we can do is control our attitude towards unpleasant things.

Like my mom, I have been surprised time and time again at the relief that comes with letting go of worry.  Disposing of the physical manifestations (such as bills) is the easy part, the trick is letting go of the worry that is less tangible.

Still, it's a start. And as I currently have some worries to toss into the fireplace I am grateful to mom once again for this valuable tip.

Let 'em burn!

8 comments:

37paddington said...

She's a beauty, your mom. And a wise woman.

May your worries, whatever they are, be eased.

Sending you a hug, my friend.

Gary said...

Thanks darling!

Barbara said...

You guys are so cute in your little matching outfits. I too hope your worries burn right up and never return. But if they do, you can just throw them away again.

I continue to marvel at how smart your mom is!

Gary said...

She is a work of art! I love that you added on to this - you know I will keep throwing them away. xo

Barbies4Sale! said...

I never worry in the first place as;
1. I know that one day, sooner or later, the thing that would worry me, will work itself out.
Or, 2. That one day, sooner or later, I will do something to fix it.

But until one of those two days come, I "Will Not" worry. One, because I'm too busy living a life that is going to be Far Too short.
And two because, true bliss, which is what this blog is about. Can only be found inside one's self. In being true to your self. In Knowing, yourself.

Which is why my bliss comes in "knowing", that one day, sooner or later, I'll get to it. That is, "if", the problem is still around when I get to it. Which, if it isn't. Then maybe it wasn't such a big problem after all. ;)

~ Ken

Gary said...

Ken - Good points. I try to feel this way but sometimes worry gets the best of me and I can't let it go. That is when I need the finality of the "fire" and can return to the state of mind you wrote about. Thanks for sharing.

Kellyann Brown said...

I was talking to my mom the other day, complaining that something I had cooked hadn't turned out that great. She gave me this piece of advice: "Sometimes you just have to get out the crackers and call it soup!" Now I am beginning to think that this could be applied to many things in my life!

Gary said...

Kellyann - Moms are so smart aren't they? The cracker comment reminds me of When Life Gives You Lemons, Make Lemonade. So, how was the soup? :)

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